I’m on a Short Leash

After dutifully and carefully keeping to my schedule for the last two weeks – and being stable without meds – I went out for a drink last night. I met some friends I hadn’t seen in months and I enjoyed myself tremendously since I had pretty much been a recluse for a while.

I had only two drinks over a 2 hour period, and I left everybody at the bar to be home by 12:15 am.

So I was careful and everything went fine. Well…no. I didn’t get enough sleep and I woke up feeling very out of sorts this morning. And a bit late. And somewhat hungover, though I can’t figure out how I could be hungover on two drinks.

Both getting up late and feeling hungover disrupted my schedule, and I started destabilising. Incredible. It really didn’t take much.

I was able to reset my schedule by this afternoon, but still. Even small changes make a big difference – which means that I don’t have much leeway in varying my schedule at all. A darned short leash I’m on.

I’m not thrilled that I have to choose between socialising with some of my friends and being stable. I’d much rather be stable, but I begining to get worried that I’ll turn into one of those single old men with 15 dogs in their yard and car.

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