How we feel while we are Depressed!

A Depression episode is NOT fun. We are unable to do things, and we watch helplessly as projects we are doing fail. We can't even do personal or home maintenance. We stop going out and meeting people because we can't get out of the house and because we become afraid of people. During the depression... Continue Reading →

Panadol (acetaminophen)

I've recently realised that one of the symptoms of Depression can be pain - usually in the form of headaches, but also in the form of generalised aching or tiredness. You might think I'd have realised this before, like sometime over the last twenty years. But we aren't always that observant, especially for things that... Continue Reading →

Depressed ISN’T Sad

One of the problems with being bipolar is it's hard to describe what depression or mania or mood swings are. We commonly get annoyed when friends misunderstand us. But it is also hard to describe to YOURSELF what the hell is going on even as the depression is happening to you. Think about that. You... Continue Reading →

Depression as Pain

I've found that if you are somewhat depressed and still able to function, or a lot depressed and forcing yourself to function, then one of the manifestations of trying to get things done is pain. When we say depression hurts, this is not some existential, woe is me, hurt. It's real pain that occurs when... Continue Reading →

Books for Bipolar Persons

So I'm in an Indigo bookstore in Toronto. And it's wonderful, maybe I'll spend the rest of my vacation in here.  Anyhoo, apart from checking out my favourite authors and the entire Sci-Fi section, I thought I'd check out the stuff on being bipolar. And their collection is okay. And they have books about being... Continue Reading →

Staying Home When I am Depressed

Someone once asked me how I cope with depression. It's easy. When I'm depressed, I just sit in my house, don't talk to anyone and wait for the depression episode to pass. The reason I'm ok about sitting in my house is that I treat depression as a physical disease - thinking of it as,... Continue Reading →

Still Not Depressed

It's been 11 days since I took the 20 mg of Ketamine. I still haven't gotten depressed yet. This is exceptional because according to my experiences from the last 15 years, I should have gotten depressed already. More to the point, I've taken no other medication since I took the Ketamine. Quite frankly, I'm quietly celebrating. If... Continue Reading →

Depression and taking Ketamine

I tried Ketamine yesterday. I had been in a depression episode that lasted through all of September, which is a very long episode for me. This is problematical, because while many of the antidepressants have some effect in preventing me from getting depressed, none work to actually get me out of depression. So there I... Continue Reading →

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